It’s been a while since I have written here for the last time. I am now almost two months after the surgery, my body is recovering very fast. I do not have a single sign of those symptoms that I have been encountering all over the internet that worried me too much. Also, to talk about my progress, I have found a counselor with whom I have had 10 meetings already, I do not know how to describe the time we spent talking and discussing all of that filthy stuff that usually appears in my head every once a while. Anyways, It has been a lot easier to think about what I have become after I had to talk to someone besides my husband. He is here, he is my support, he loves me very much and I love him too but I do not think that he needs to hear from me how I hate my life any more….
Also, we have started thinking about moving forward. As all of this began with our desire to have kids and as I am now feeling better even at the slightest mention of life with children. I think that in a month or two I will be ready to go for surrogacy… Yes, this is me, these words are coming from my mouth or I guess from my fingers.
Surrogacy… I began to read articles and other stuff on the Internet and it made me either curious than angry as before. What I can say, therapy did help me…
Well, nothing is settled yet, my husband is the one who is looking for some options I am trying to stay away from it because you never know. As I was told by my therapist it is always too risky to do new things as they literally may trigger me out of nowhere.
I just hope that someday I will be happy.